How to change things from Dull to Fun

The lackey is very busy at her work and this means our nights on workdays are very dull – cuddles when she gets home, food, walk, telly, bed. This is okay, it’s a good routine that we both cope well with but it gets duller than a used chew toy that doesn’t taste good any more. So I thought I’d make things more interesting for us both over the weekend. The lackey did some cleaning so I did some digging and tracked some nice dirt back inside as soon as the vacuum was silent again. The lackey wasted some time on her computer while I had my nap. This was allowable and I didn’t bother giving her grief over it as she let me sleep and made almost no noise. The lackey fed and walked me and we sat down to watch some telly. Wrong – I had to play first. Tug-of-wars was only half hearted as the lackey sat down on the floor and watched the telly more than she watched me. She did whine a few times that she was trying to watch her show but who cares about that. Then I went outside to complain to the neighbours that they were making far too much noise and when I came back inside the lackey was knitting. Absolutely not! When she knits, the damn thing she’s been working on the whole time I’ve known her is spread out over the low table and her lap and she gets all huffy if I try and stand on her for scratches. So, in order to show her the error of her ways, I initiated a stealth attack. I waited until her attention was firmly on counting loops of wool and dived up onto the lounge and onto her leg. My aim was perfect as I scored bonus points for knocking her full glass of water onto the papers on the table and down her leg. She made this weird noise and then kept going no, no, no, no as she tried to put the needles down without unhooking the wool, not stab me, push me off her lap, stop the glass from rolling onto the floor, save the papers from the spill and pick up the water. I would have scored maximum points if she had cried but she held herself together and got the cloth to clean up the spill. I sat there looking very pleased with myself because the water had removed some ink from the papers on the low table and the lackey was worried she’d have to stop knitting to re-do her pattern. Victory! But it was very short-lived. Apparently the pattern is the same left and right so she just checked the dry side and did it backwards to make up the bits that got washed away. But I was not finished! During the night, I pretended to need to pee after every nap so I had the lackey up and down all night and she was so tired and worn out that I didn’t even get yelled at. Mind you, at deep dark she did refuse (with bad words) to get out of bed at all. Then I got her up at sunrise this morning for breakfast. See – much more interesting!